It can cause a headache or migraine, or a nagging feeling of guilt. It keeps you from sticking to your diet, or going to the gym. It shows up inside you, in your personal relationships, between groups, or factions, and on a larger scale, it can explode into war.
I’m talking about conflict, which you may not have realized has been a root cause of your self-sabotage.
Defined by dictionary.com as, “discord of action, feeling, or effect; antagonism or opposition,” conflict appears to be a natural part of the human condition. Or is it?
On a personal level, conflict simmers below the surface, keeping you from living life fully. Things like helping a friend or relative when you really don’t want to; feeling guilty about bailing on chores to do something fun; avoiding activities you KNOW are good for you… all mean you’re in conflict.
You may find it surprising, but there is good news… fear and conflict are the same, and can be resolved with love. Yes, that may sound a bit simplistic, so I’ve included an easy way to release conflict and live your life wholeheartedly.
How to Tame Conflict and Live Happier:
1- Don’t “Should” on yourself! The world “should” is a dead giveaway that you feel obliged. It means you are not committed 100% to what you’re doing. (And you’d rather be doing something else!) It’s the same with the words, “Have to”.
2- Stop What You’re Doing – If you get that “something’s wrong” feeling when you set out to do something. Stop. Recognize that you are in conflict.
3- Write it all out – Grab a sheet of paper. Fold it down the middle. Write down the benefits of doing it in the left column, and the reasons why you don’t want to do it in the right.
4- Feel it – Allow yourself to feel both aspects at the same time… I want to, but I don’t want to, Sit with both feelings for a while without judgment, and imagine these feelings surrounded with a bubble of love. It may feel uncomfortable or weird, but hang in there!
Bringing your feelings to the light, acknowledging, allowing, and surrounding them with love may be all you need to move into a space of happiness, committing 100% to living life fully.